Absolute stillness on the side of a ridge
Posted: 17/10/2025
Random attempt at free verse. I was too tired to rhyme, but not tired enough to reflect :P
There is a real value in solitude. To be given a space where you can exist by yourself without regard to the rest of the world. But my solitude exists beyond my own room- it can be anywhere, in the middle of a crowd or in the foothills of a foreign country (sometimes that foreign country is America, sometimes that foreign country is New Zealand). There is also a value in sharing solitude. But who do you share it with? Who could want your solitude? Who wants to be with you as you drive under the stars or swim through the waves or cry on your bed? Who will ever embrace you, or value you as much as they value themselves, or volunteer themselves for you in a time you need but can't ask for it?
There's only a couple friends I feel this way towards mutually. Sometimes they seem closer than my family, though they might not know it. I don't completely understand those relationships, because sometimes I feel as if they haven't been entirely my own doing, and sometimes I'm not sure if I'm even deserving of them. But maybe they're the closest I come to the connections I feel like I've lacked. Perhaps I've just been inconsiderate and I have those already. But I am lucky to have those people, in any case, and I ought to show my love for them more often.
This photo was taken on the Sandia foothills in Albuquerque, New Mexico last December, the last time I visited my oma. In those hills it can go from chilling to what I'd call summer temperatures within half an hour, as the sun rises over the hill. That walk was quite fun, and to look over Albuquerque from a vantage point was quite interesting - it's a very odd city! Don't try walking there.